Recently I’ve given a lot of thought to the differences and similarities of the parent I thought I’d be and the parent that I am. I can remember while pregnant the rules I thought I’d live by, the mother code I thought I’d follow. It’s interesting to look back now and see what things stayed true and what things quickly fell apart.
While pregnant I swore up and down that Greyson would not ever have a pacifier. He still sleeps with one every night.
While pregnant I was fairly certain I would only breastfeed until 6 months. He’ll be 2 next week and still nurses a few times a day.
While pregnant I thought our days would be full of play groups, mommy clubs, trips to the park, the zoo, the library. I thought that my house would be spotless, my child would be perfectly pressed, clean and always cooperative and chipper. (I’ll pause while you control your laughter….) In reality, laundry tends to stay a load or seven ahead of me, there are always crumbs under the highchair, even if I just mopped 2 minutes ago. Toys liter every square inch of our house, Greyson while always adorable is rarely perfectly pressed, without a smear of something somewhere, he’s mostly chipper and cooperative but in the moments when he’s not, he does his best to make up for the time that he was. We venture out as often as possible but days tend to turn into weeks and before you know it another week is gone and we’ve only gone to one play group.
With all of the differences and the things that turned out to be the same, there is one major difference. While pregnant I knew I would love being a mom, I knew I would love Greyson. I thought I knew how much, and I was so wrong. I love him and being a mom so much more. I love that motherhood turned out differently than I thought, because it’s so much more than I thought it would be. It’s more fun, even when we just stay home, it’s more rewarding, even when the laundry piles are as tall as I am, it’s more love, and acting silly, it’s more snuggles and giggles, it’s more late nights and early mornings that someday I’ll miss and long for, it’s more of everything and I couldn’t be a happier momma because of it.
So, to my sweet boy, who’s growing up way too fast, thank you for giving mommy so much “more”, you have enriched my life in every way.
While pregnant I swore up and down that Greyson would not ever have a pacifier. He still sleeps with one every night.
While pregnant I was fairly certain I would only breastfeed until 6 months. He’ll be 2 next week and still nurses a few times a day.
While pregnant I thought our days would be full of play groups, mommy clubs, trips to the park, the zoo, the library. I thought that my house would be spotless, my child would be perfectly pressed, clean and always cooperative and chipper. (I’ll pause while you control your laughter….) In reality, laundry tends to stay a load or seven ahead of me, there are always crumbs under the highchair, even if I just mopped 2 minutes ago. Toys liter every square inch of our house, Greyson while always adorable is rarely perfectly pressed, without a smear of something somewhere, he’s mostly chipper and cooperative but in the moments when he’s not, he does his best to make up for the time that he was. We venture out as often as possible but days tend to turn into weeks and before you know it another week is gone and we’ve only gone to one play group.
With all of the differences and the things that turned out to be the same, there is one major difference. While pregnant I knew I would love being a mom, I knew I would love Greyson. I thought I knew how much, and I was so wrong. I love him and being a mom so much more. I love that motherhood turned out differently than I thought, because it’s so much more than I thought it would be. It’s more fun, even when we just stay home, it’s more rewarding, even when the laundry piles are as tall as I am, it’s more love, and acting silly, it’s more snuggles and giggles, it’s more late nights and early mornings that someday I’ll miss and long for, it’s more of everything and I couldn’t be a happier momma because of it.
So, to my sweet boy, who’s growing up way too fast, thank you for giving mommy so much “more”, you have enriched my life in every way.
Dear Greyson,
ReplyDeleteI know that some day your Mommy is going to give you this book about how much she loves you. I know that you have the very best Mom possible; and the words that you read in her journal to you are true! How do I know this? Because I am your Moms Mother and we as Moms know everything about our children. Always be good for your Mommy and love her always!!! I love you Greyson and miss you very much. I love your picture and happy smile. Always my love to you, Grandma Carol