Dude… Tomorrow you will be 9 years old… That’s half way to
off to college and out of the house, and oh my goodness how did this happen??
So, there’s a lot that hasn’t been said this last year, and
I think that now is the time to say it.
You’ve had quite a year my love bug and when I think about it I get
really sad. You are the most amazing
child, and not just because you are kind, and smart and handsome and funny and
all those wonderful things that you are, but because you are so strong,
stronger than your mommy could ever be.
This year Mommy and Daddy got divorced.
I hate that for you. I hate that
you struggle with it, that it makes you sad, that you don’t understand. I hate that there is nothing I can do to make
it better, to make it ok. I hate that
while all of that was happening your mommy was diagnosed with cancer, and that
I had to rely on you so much to take care of yourself because I was physically
unable. I hate that you know that fear,
that you were forced to grow up so quickly…
On the other hand… I’m awed by you… I could not have
survived the last year without you. You
were my reason to keep pushing, to keep going.
You were the happiness that got me through those long months of
radiation, you are the reason that I am cancer free today and recovering and
feeling stronger and healthier every day… that’s all you my love, you were my
only reason to keep living, and that’s pretty special and I’m pretty thankful,
and I couldn’t love you more, except for every day… I do.
So, even though eight wasn’t the greatest, we did have some
fun… You made it through 2nd grade, which wasn’t your most favorite
year of school ever, but you rocked it like a champ, stayed true to yourself
and I was so proud of you you!!! Summer
break was kind of lame since you went and broke your ankle!! We moved to the beach and we love our new
home, its lovely and a work in progress as mommy renovates the entire thing,
but we have a great pool and we’re just a 3 minute walk to our toes in the
sand. Of course with your ankle in a
cast all summer we didn’t get to do those things, but we are making up for lost
time now!! Like the Disney Cruise we
just got home from that deserves its own post entirely!! You are LOVING 3rd grade so much
and doing some super cool and amazing things that have mommy so excited for you!
All in all buddy, eight was a rough one. I wish with all my heart I could change that
for you. I hope that as time goes on,
our hearts continue to heal and we build our new normal, and that we find
happiness and peace within it… The things that remain and always will are my
love for you. You are my rock, my heart and
my happiness. Through each trial thrown
your way you have continued to prove what a remarkable, compassionate and
amazing young man you are. I am so proud
to be your mom. I love you more than
words could ever say. Thank you for all
that you are…
To the moon my love,
Mommy
Hey there, my dear cousin. I know I like never post comments but I do check your blog every time and again hoping to hear some new tidbit about how things are going. I'm so sorry for all that you have gone through in the last year. I hope that everything works out and I just want you to know that I love ya.
ReplyDeleteShannon
Shan!! This comment made me smile so much!! I check your blog as well and am always happy to see that you look so happy!! I think of you often... Love ya!!
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