It's his path....

As a mother you try every day not to compare your child to other children, it’s the hardest thing in the world to not do. (Almost as hard as not eating homemade cookies or brownies, or anything that’s not good for you and in the cupboard, or shelves of a near by store!) You see other children and wonder how old they are, are they bigger, stronger, faster, smarter? If they are does it matter? Do you feel as if you are less of a parent or vice versa do you feel like more of a parent if you feel that your child is the biggest, strongest, fastest, smartest? It’s so draining and so annoying. I try so hard to not be that mother, yet I find those thoughts dancing in the recesses of my mind, flirting with full blown paranoia! In one breath you find yourself speaking confidently on where your child is, how smart he is, how big, how strong, how adorable, and then the next breath speaks of him taking his time, he’ll do it when he’s ready…. I annoy myself. I strive to be the mother who lives in the moment. Who celebrates each single new thing done, who doesn’t look for the next big milestone or push to get there. I’m told everyday that in a blink of an eye he’ll be a man and I know that it’s true. The last two years have flown by and I wonder if I really did enjoy them as much as I could have. Did I hold him enough in the middle of the night, did I spend enough time just watching him sleep, did he laugh enough, did I laugh enough? I want to make sure that I enjoy each moment, every single moment, rather than waiting for the next big milestone.I’m lucky enough to be home with my child, I’m lucky enough to be with him all day, every day. I want to start each day fresh, knowing that something new will happen and I’m lucky enough to see it, experience it, and know about it. I want to let go of the “when will he do this” and enjoy the “look at what he just did”. I want to let go of the hurry up we’ve got a schedule to keep and embrace the moments of chaos, the craziness of lunch time and getting dressed, the cute little tushy that runs from me at bath time, the puddles of splashed water, the extra story at bed time. Before I know it, I won’t be part of those moments, will I look back and feel bad for not enjoying each moment, will I think I was in too big of hurry for him to “grow up and do something new”?? I sure hope not. I know that hours turn into days and days into weeks, weeks into months, and then years. I hope that I can beat the questions, honestly believe and trust in the fact that every day he is meeting a milestone, that the big ones will come when they come, and to stop obsessing… He definitely walks his own path and in doing so he’s teaching his Mama quite a few valuable lessons. I love you little Weeble Wobble, so very very much!!!