Sleep.

Last night I finally succumbed to sleep. It was fitful and broken and at times heartbreakingly sad, but I did get some, and today I feel better because of it. I went for a walk this morning, the air seemed so fresh and warm, the sky as blue as blue can be and sun that warmed just a bit too much. It was good. I’m not as angry today, maybe it will come back, and maybe it won’t. I’m trying to pick up the pieces, but it’s hard when the pieces are so shattered they're barely recognizable. So for now, I’m picking up what I can see. I’m focusing on Greyson, who eases my hearts pain each and every day, my husband who’s provided me the biggest and best shoulder’s to lean, cry and grieve on ever, and myself, allowing myself the time and space and ability to feel what I need to feel.

Today is a better day. I don’t know if I’ll ever have truly good days again, but today is better. I’m sure that rough days will be along again, some worse than others, but in this moment it’s one day, one hour, even one minute at a time.

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P.S. – Thanks for the card, it came yesterday. At a time when nothing could be said that was right, nothing could make me feel better, nothing could be ok, your card and your note were exactly what I needed, couldn’t have come at a better time. I love and miss you too, I really really do.